Home Remedies

I dyed my hair. And instead of it coming out "light golden brown" it came out "DARK AS MOLASSES."

Standing in front of the aisle of hair color in the store, I chose my color carefully. I studied all the boxes practically one by one. Many boxes bragged on "no brassy tones." Some even said 100% gray coverage. But I always look at the girls on the front of the boxes. Which one of these girls has the color I want. Should be that simple.

"Light golden brown...100% gray coverage.... nice and easy." That's for me!

Who has time for hair testing like the box recommends? Get on the gloves, prepare the mixture, slop on hair. Wait.

Hop in the shower, rinse. Towel dry and WALA. Magically appear Light Golden Brown.

Nope. I have Hot Fudge Chocolate. On my head.

So what does one do? Go to the internet where all questions have answers. I type in "How to lighten hair dyed too dark."

And there are the answers!

#1. Wash hair with Dawn dishwashing liquid. Can you believe that I actually HAVE Dawn under my sink? Back in the shower and I'm lathering with Dawn. I should have brought in a few dirty glasses and I could have been multi-tasking. I lather in the Dawn and leave it in a little longer thinking this would lighten my hair even more.
Out of the shower, towel off and WALA. Hot Fudge Chocolate.

#2. Make a paste with Olive Oil and Mayonnaise. Just use a few drops of Mayonnaise and leave on 20 minutes. First off, does Mayonnaise come in drop form? Or do I drop it like dropping cookie dough on the cookie tray? But I have both of these ingredients in my pantry. Make a paste. First attempt I used too much oil and the mayonnaise didn't gel with the oil. Toss. Second attempt, used less oil and a "drop" or two of Hellmann's. Back in the shower and slop on the paste. Towel off and let the paste do it's magic. Shouldn't I see the color lifting? Maybe it will come off when I wash this gook outta my hair. Patiently wait 20 minutes, BACK in the shower and wash off. Towel off (I am now on my third towel) and WALA. Hot Fudge Chocolate.

#3. Use Lemon Juice. But I also read this should be used on blonde hair and if you have brunette hair, it MIGHT turn your hair orange. Orange with hot fudge? Visions of orange tootsie pop jumped in my brain. I don't think so. Plus I remember doing this when I was in high school when it was fashionable to sit in the sun and let the lemon juice highlight your hair naturally. It didn't work then either.

#4. Tide detergent. Yup, wash your hair with Tide. Reminds me of my dad's joke... why do people wash their clothes intide? Cause it's too cold outtide. But I don't have Tide detergent. Tide isn't good for septic tanks. I don't think it would be too good for my hair.

So there you have it. I have Hot Fudge Chocolate Hair that smells like Dawn with a touch of mayonnaise. And I can't remember the last time I took 4 showers in one afternoon.

Plus side tho is the rest of my body has a clean soft feeling from the Olive Oil. Hair's a little damaged tho...